Counselling for Anger Management 

Why do we experience anger?

Anger is part of our emotional makeup to help us form an appropriate reaction to protect ourselves when we have been attacked, invalidated, unfairly treated or deceived. It can be really useful in these situations to help us identify people or situations that are hurting us, defend ourselves in dangerous situations and motivate us to make a change in our lives.

Feeling anger releases high levels of adrenaline in our bodies which causes raised heartbeat, high temperature and palpitations. If we are experiencing this too regularly or over a prolonged period of time can lead to depression, anxiety, lower functioning immune system and high blood pressure. Experiencing bouts of anger on a daily basis can be really exhausting to cope with and it can also have a devastating impact on the people around us, both professionally and personally. Living or working with someone who has repeated angry outbursts can be wearing and make our day to day lives feel miserable.

If you can relate to any of the below feelings or behaviours, it may be time to get help for your sake and for the sake of those around you:

Feelings

• Our anger is having a negative impact on our mental and physical health

• We don’t feel any emotion other than anger, it’s our go-to in any situation

• We’re not aware of any healthy ways to express our anger
  

Behaviours

• Showing our aggression through shouting, swearing, slamming doors, hitting or throwing things, being physically violent or verbally abusive towards others

• Turning our anger inwards resulting in self-harming, denying ourselves basic needs and cutting ourselves off from friends and family

• Showing our aggression passively by ignoring people, refusing to do tasks, deliberately doing things poorly, being sarcastic or sulky

ANGER MANAGEMENT AND COUNSELLING

Issues with anger lie in our ability to manage our attitude to certain triggers. Anger is often a secondary emotion that protects us from the more vulnerable emotion beneath it. For example, if we are angry at another driver for an unsafe manoeuvre, we may shout and display anger to cover up the fear of being physically hurt in an accident caused by their unsafe driving. We cannot control the situations that cause anger but we can unlearn our existing reactions and behaviours and replace them with new ones. 

Counselling is a popular method to support people with anger management issues because a counsellor will not only address your current behaviours but look into your past to determine where these patterns originated from, changing them for good. Your counsellor will help you to explore the triggers that cause your anger and develop the skills you need to handle these situations and your reactions more effectively. They will also work with you to uncover some of the other emotions entangled with your anger such as shame, fear and embarrassment which could be resulting in a continuation or worsening of your anger issues. You’ll learn to communicate your feelings and express yourself effectively and turn destructive behaviour into constructive responses enabling you and your loved ones to live a calmer and happier life.